One Flew West

from by Jon Watts

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Raindrop pitter patter in the trees. this is the same spot, opened up against the breeze. there's no people here. The sky is wide open and it's equally clear that he's got his family hoping he's dissappeared. He's dissappeared. Models of his fraudalence envelope him, embellishing a fellowship that no one feels. Is no one real, taking time for him to heal. The place is like a ditch, it's in the middle of the forest. It's the place he escapes, it's avoiding the chorus. it's more than just a spot and it's less than a home but he's got to have a place that he feels within his bones.

About ten am the shell of a friend is telling him when he's got to cut up his skin. it's hanging from a lampost, every sample he gets... he wants another peice of it, he's throwing a fit. It's going to get him killed and he knows it.

It's darkness now. It's spinning around. the truck is speeding up and that's the only sound. The truck is speeding up, his mind is slowing down.

(making people help themselves, Central Center Mental Health)

It's pills out time, the nurse is smiles. It's the whitewashed walls and the cursed tile. Will he get
(Let's kill cloud nine, that's my first desire. it's quite posh squalls but the earth will die. Said)
help here, cause it's not the promises that cost him his feeling. It's not the the ditch, his place
(that it felt clear and it's got the amishness accosted the ceiling. It's got itch his case in)
of healing... stealing glances at the clerk. Cameras taking his soul, it's making a mole, forsaking
(clearing. Hearing dances in the work. Stamina's faking a role, it's taking it's toll, it's aching)
the poll, and faking a role. It's taking it's toll, aching his soul, it's making him old.
(his soul, it's taking his soul, forsaking the poll, making a mole, it's making him old.)

He hates you. You deserve it. You don't want to. It's not worth it. Don't tell him what you said, his side of the bed provided bread inside of your head inside of your head inside of your head inside of your head.

Ok, it's a good rule. He hates you. That was Ok, that was Ok. I'll make you a hunk of a man. You deserve it. It's a good rule.

"It's just you and me now, and that's it. You don't want to. James got hurt. Don't cheat on that test! It's not worth it. I am af@*ing disaster. How do you lose your watch when it's strapped to your f#@*ing wrist? Don't tell him what you said I'm so shaky. you lose Everything. his side of the bed provided bread it's pity puddles. I kind of miss you all the time. It pushes me down. why doHe n't you come by ever? inside of your head You cut yourself off. Sleeping on the couch. inside of your head Cold potato skins. inside of your head If you want more, there's more in there. your name is on everything nside of your head. You can do it inside of your head insid (fuck you, shut up.) ie of your head Shake hands, boy. If I was by myself... Shake them. inside of your head ,inside of your head. . I was getting kind of numb."


from Self, released April 5, 2004


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